Do you feel frustrated or overwhelmed? Would you like to be more focused, empowered and productive?

Here’s something that will help...

I was recently having a catch up with a friend. She was telling me about her work, how overloaded she felt and how frustrated she was about changes that were happening and decisions that were being made. As she spoke, I noticed her angst rising and her fixation on what "they" were doing. When she came to a natural pause, I asked her, "Do you have control over any of this?". "None" she said, so I asked "Can you influence it in any way?" She paused to think and recognised that a number of the things she was frustrated with, she also had no influence over. "So why are you spending so much of your time and emotional energy on them?", I said. A look of realisation lit up in her eyes." If you can't affect them, don't waste your time and emotional energy on them. Let them go and focus on what you can do". We went on to explore the things that she could control and influence, and how she could go about affecting them. As she talked, she sat up straighter, her shoulders relaxed, her eyes brightened, and her tone became lighter and more animated. "I feel so much better", she said finally. "I can now see where I can make a difference. I feel so much lighter and more focused".

While we often have a lot on our plate, we can unknowingly make things harder for ourselves by investing too much time and energy on things that we can’t actually affect. This dilutes our focus and leaves us with less energy for those really important things that we can impact and will ultimately make ‘our boats go faster’.

Covey’s Circle of Influence and Control model is a simple and handy tool to check in with where you’re at and remind yourself of the things you should be focusing your energy and attention on.

The inner circle is known as the Circle of Control. This encompasses situations and challenges that we have direct control over, for example, how we respond to things - our actions and our behaviours.

The middle circle is the Circle of Influence. This includes issues and concerns that we don’t have direct control over, but can impact or influence through our own decisions and actions.

The outside circle is the Circle of Concern and encompasses all of our concerns and the issues we face, but can do nothing about. It’s the biggest circle because there are so many things that we have no power to change.

When we put time and energy into focusing on things in our circle of concern we become reactive, frustrated, overwhelmed and critical, whereas when we invest time and energy into those things that are within our circles of influence and control, we feel more empowered and focused, and are more effective in positively influencing relationships and results.

Simply put...

If you can’t control or influence it, let it go.

Focus on what you can change, not on what you can’t.

To help yourself or your team regain perspective, positivity and focus, you can simply do the following:

• Draw 3 circles on a piece of paper.

• Write down all of your concerns on individual sticky notes and place them in your circle of concern.

• Ask yourself, "what are the things I have no control or influence over?"– leave them in the circle of concern.

• Move the remaining notes from your circle of concern into your circles of control and influence, and then create a plan for how you will proactively address them.